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Lost Causes and Silver Linings"I don't watch tv." He says as he flicks his cigarette.
Marlboro red's, always.
"Oh..." I mumble
"I'm sorry. I just assumed..." I say,
but I stop
'cause it's all wrong again,
"Go spew your bullshit to someone who's willing to swallow it."
He is acidic yet sympathetic,
soft, always soft.
"Get on with your life..." he pauses with split-second hesitation,
"...and stay the fuck out of mine."
I see concern creasing betwixt his brows, wrinkles of remorse,
And I think maybe, just maybe
he'll miss me
'cause god knows
"I'll miss you..."
"Don't. Just don't."
His words reverberate through my veins; lava cauterizing arteries.
"Why do you insist on making this harder on yourself?
You knew the situation was temporary,
and we aren't even the same people anymore.
I'm not the same anymore...
I'm sorry if you can't understand but that's just how it is.
Penitence.It was sheer magnetism. Gravity.
Some might even call it fate.
When I feel the undesirable pull of death
I follow storm clouds patiently,
waiting for God to release himself.
UntitledIt wasn't outright. It wasn't intentional.
I mean it's not like you meant to but still
here I am
with an "accidental" scalpel
pressed to my underbelly.
Surgical steel threatening my navel.
And I shoulda known better.
Shoulda seen what was coming next.
There's a sickening sloshing flop
as intestines distend from my stomach.
A thud of blood and mud as they saturate into the soil.
I stay to watch the steam of body heat rise up from my organs. Dense vapors dispersing into the morning mist.
And I expected pain or possibly death but there was nothing, a vacancy
"Just a taste..?"
Fangs and a forked tongue
snake in the grass.
"If she is the one you want then go..."
Diseased.I can't think. Something is wrong with my insides. I can feel the twist of intestines strangling my stomach.
It hurts like cancer, like leprosy. Gang-green in my gullet, chemical burns in my bones.
and it's in me
it is me
memories like lava
acidic liquids cauterizing life
Goodbye Means I Love You“How can you be so obtuse?”
Jessica’s eyes look crinkled, contemplative.
Slowly her expression softens, confusion creasing into her facial features.
“What happened to you?”
And I’m silent, staring back at her, blank-faced and stone-still.
Why should I explain it? Why even bother to say sorry? I wouldn’t mean it anyway.
“We need you, ya’ know. The both of us do.”
And for a second I stutter, faltering in resolve.
“You’re the strong one, the practical one. What are we supposed to do without you?”
For a moment I remain undecided, entertaining the thought of giving up,
staying here with my family and friends.
“Jess…you know I can’t. You’ve known for quite some time.”</i>
I pronounce each syllable with intention, trying to force understanding into he
Love and Long DistanceEven if it was me, somehow I feel it wouldn’t be enough. Still… always.
How could I say it?
I could never be
What you want me to
You’d pull me under
Just to save yourself…
So hey, guess what? You’re still not here.
Not that it bothers me.
Not that I believe you’d actually tell the truth anyway.
I am a toy, hardly worth playin’ with.
Too far away, always
And sometimes I feel that you love me,
And and and it is stabbing
because how could I doubt you?
the beauty of an immaculate nightmarei.
I remember the warmth, how it whispered across my skin like an enigma.
A shy silence, a fluttering murmur.
I remember the electricity, static butterflies sparking in my stomach.
An energy quivering, vibrating my organs.
There’s chalk in my skull
I am streaming
whimsical tufts of white
I remember something in the water
like cotton or oxygen
frothing bubbles of fabric
She seemed to prefer clean sheets
sleeping on sterile satin
silken and garish
Still I yearned to look past
the ammonia and immaculate mattress
wanting to love her for who she was
to forget all that she had done.
Googily-eyed pacifist, straining
Always the chopping, butchered
then glued back together.
Almost cruel. Almost.
I Hate FacebookAnd to be quite frank, you make me sick.
And I can’t do it. I can’t do it anymore.
Sit and sift through their lives.
Preening and polished.
And I think I hate them.
Or maybe it’s myself I hate.
The lack of supposed importance.
The lack of substantial proof. I was there, I was happy.
And sometimes we are alive even when we are dead.
Tidbits of time caught on film.
Faces trapped in photographs.
Something. I was someone.
ZombiesDead rising from the graves
To prey on the living
Driven by instinct
And not by thought
They're nothing but tools
Used by an evil mastermind
To destroy mankind
And create a new world
A world of despair and darkness
Ghosts of a Belle Dame"Those that go do not return,"
tales tell of the woods, be wary;
no good can come of entering.
Not that anyone lives to speak.
This path was his quickest means
with dead branches and peeling bark.
Everything falling away
like a corpse shedding its skin.
He knew the cost of his road
and soon grew fearful of it.
Gusts of wind forced his step
and the copse invited him in.
There were whispers in the trees
and eyes in every shadow.
His mind was not a trickster
and the forest possessed no life.
A faint hand fumbled out,
and he felt it against his skin.
Alas, his eyes could not perceive
what he knew to be there.
"Hide not in the gloom,"
he spoke into nothing,
"- the winds and moon betray you."
He choked through ash and dread,
"And you are revealed."
An apparition of light and pain
flew from the dark in earnest.
A knight of old armor and crest
whose face was stricken with woe.
A word could not escape him
and he motioned to the Earth.
Scattered in piles around them
were the bones of visi
Sadism.She sleeps with a knife
Next to her right,
As she falls asleep
To her day dream...
So carefully she drags
The thin metal
Against your hot neck,
Not letting go
Until the blood has drained,
And your skin
Is as ice frozen as her heart
The blade shines brightest as
Sits upon her tasteful tongue,
Now blood red
She sleeps with a smile
With her blade nearby,
As she slips into slumber
After her dream has lived
GoneI walk down the steps
I see all the marks I know that there gone
I know I cannot help
I sit on the floor looking round I see where they lay
I see all around and I watch all the blood dripping down.
Raven BoyI heard one night
That the raven boy smiled.
His eyes black as night;
A sign of death.
The safety of her their dreams
Cannot grasp the sibling.
A gaze into his eyes
Drives them into sudden hysteria.
As the children fall deeper
Into the vortex of madness,
The raven boy smirks
Letting their screams open the ground.
The wandering deadI woke in a forest of petrified wood
Why I was there, I did not know
I screamed for help as loud as I could
In answer, I heard only crows
It was then that I saw the wandering dead
There limbs were long, their heads were thin
yellow teeth, and eyes blood red
all wrapped up in rotten skin
They stared at me with unblinking eyes
and began to sing a macabre hymn
of wails, moans, giggles, and cries
Inviting me to join them
I ran away from the undead wave
refusing to accept such a fate
I came upon a lonely grave
and learned I was too late
The Great ThiefMy empty gaze
and bony smile
these features of mine
will leave you as pale
as my accursed face
Shrouded am I
in black robes
and dark intent
and like a thief in the night
I come to steal you away
Tears may fall at my theft
but I could care less
After all I've been doing this
Since the beginning
And I don't see an end to my thievery
Many have tried
but all have failed
to escape my grasp
Little do you know
that my reach knows no bounds
No matter how far you run
No matter where you hide
I will find you
and I will steal you away
to my realm of Peace and Darkness
To fight me
is to fight Fate
But please do continue
To fight me,
'cause it's no fun if you just let me take you.
Love Can Be WarYou know I will slay
the dragons that chase you,
rip their hearts out
with only my hands,
turn the sky red with blood,
watching it tumble to the earth.
I will stand between you
and armies of thousands,
bring them to their knees,
set the sky afire and let it rain
down upon their heads.
Even your demons
I route them out one by one,
rip my flesh from my bones
as they might,
no matter what nightmares
they dare to unleash,
I will drive them all out and leave
them twisted and impotent.
Broken and bloody as I may be
as long as I draw breath
I won't stop fighting for you,
through the caverns of hell
I'd walk to bring you back
and I would never let go and never look back
until I knew we where free.
Fear The DarkDark, cold, winter.
We were both inside.
Sitting by the fire.
Clock struck three;
Bong, bong, bong.
She scooted closer.
Words had left her lips.
I looked into a hall of darkness.
The shadows moved.
Sighing; I had once thought the followers were gone.
I was wrong.
We were both the same; her and I.
Seeing things at night; them following us.
She hasn't been sleeping, nor have I.
Tonight is the night we were to rest.
Laying down, she laid next to me.
She was gripping the blanket.
Flashing her a smile; warm as the fire.
“It’ll be okay.”, I said as quiet as the dead.
Her eyes lowered, as she nodded.
Silence bugged me.
She jerked her body upward; eyeing the darkness.
I rose, peering over to see eyes staring back at me.
Breathing shook, just like her body.
Then, I knew.
This was the one troubling her.
Lunging forward, I reached towards.
I was annoyed, it needed to go.
She screamed forth my na
Clarity Through Pinhole EyesThis leather-faced beauty, once belonged to me.
Empty-headed nostalgia stained to consciousness. Watch the concrete-chunk agony leak through pin pricked eyelids.
Still she cannot feel it.
Thirsty fingers reaching through the wax rib-flesh. A quiet pleading; smoke curling through the eardrum. Voices taunting
t h o s e h a n d s
To mutilate the most tender, fragile muscle.
Oh and it burns
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